Wednesday, January 02, 2013

2013, I've Got a Bone to Pick...

In marched the new year, in spite of myself, I felt a renewed sense of hope, or at the least a vague sense of "do over." I rallied in my last post and figured out a way to flip the negativity on its head. "Live in the moment," I said. So far every moment of 2013, albeit very few have passed, has sucked. My best friend's dad died.
My illness continues to make me feel like I am in the throes of the bubonic plague.
Boy child came down with it and thus there was no sleeping last night after 1:30 AM.
I had to cancel a job interview due to said sickness and exhaustion.
Financially, this year is already a strain.
I've lost sudden touch with a good friend who was a daily part of my life.
I can't do my hikes because I am trapped in my illness and my house with quarantined child.

OK, so those are the moments with which I have been faced. Help me understand how I can live in the moment and experience anything but depression?

Now, my attempt to turn it around.
My best friend's dad was very sick and is in heaven with God and is no longer suffering his earthly pain. My friend can begin the long and painful process of grieving and letting go. This is not a very silver lining.

My illness has encouraged me to read in bed for a couple of days and I have almost completed a fantastic book, The Double Bind, by Chris Bohjalian.

My boy is sick, but he is still in good spirits.

Although up at 1:30, we did not get out of bed until 4 and even then, he played happilly with his Matchbox cars for hours. 

And, my girl child bravely and confidently went back to school while her brother stayed home. She was such a good egg to go out in the 25 degree morning and wait for the bus. (though she did have a little company of the neighbor dog, Bear, who has adopted us, especially her).

I had to cancel a job interview, but it's been easily rescheduled for next Tuesday when I most certainly will be feeling better and be far less distracted by my ill son.

Financially this year is already a strain, but my family is helping me out enough so that I don't get evicted.

The friend I have lost touch with in a sudden and painful way is teaching me a lesson about life. I am so open and so trusting...I need to move more slowly and be more skeptical. Plus, I am getting a much needed break from my iPhone. I needed to unplug.

Although, I have not been able to get out much, I was able to try my snowshoes I received from my sisters at Christmas and I love them! Also, if one is going to be held back from the outside, let it be when it is frigid and icy, rather than the first days of spring or colorful days of Fall's gorgeousness.

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