Friday, January 21, 2011

We Salute you, Mr. PBR

So, we recently moved down the street from our old house and never would have guessed we were moving into such a new unseemly neighborhood! Well, it's not really the neighborhood that's unseemly, just the one neighbor whose back porch overlooks our little side yard.

I call him Mr. PBR because the morning we were first introduced was day two of living in our new place and he had moved in across the way the night before. I was sitting peering out my favorite window in the house, which had yet to be donned with curtains. It should have felt like I was on display, but instead seemed he was. It was nary seven thirty am and this neighbor walked out, cracked a beer and lit a cigarette. The sight of it turned my stomach. I immediately named him Mr. PBR for the Pabst Blue Ribbon he was drinking.

There have been many Mr. PBR sightings since that first one, every morning in fact. Let's just say curtains were a real priority. This morning, there was not only the breakfast treat of beer and cigarettes, but a lovely porn magazine, as well. Nothing like a trifecta of seediness to kick off the day.

So, to you Mr. PBR drinking in the morning, Homer Simpson pajama, porn reading man, we salute you...and pray you are not a pedophile.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The Evolution of "Bwiends" to "Wii-maginary Friends"

When Elena was a little baby, some might remember she had a collection of rubber bath toy animals that she called her "bwiends" (friends). They went everywhere with her and filled her life with comraderie. Her imaginary friendships were rich and every bit as real as if she were playing with real preschool peers.

She doesn't play with bath animal bwiends anymore. In fact, I recently asked her if she even remembered her bwiends and she was hard pressed to recall them. Like real past relationships, they have faded in focus over time. Now, there's a new relationship in Elena's life. Her relationship to her Wii-maginary friends.

When we got the Wii for Christmas, Elena went to town creating Mii's for her and all her friends. She often plays bowling against friends from her class. She has set up avatars for all those girls she hopes to have over for play dates and sleepovers. I thought this was incredibly creative and endearing. Until...

To hear her talk about the friends' performances in the games is a bit disturbing (esp. as you recall that she is playing for herself AND them). I hear things like:

"Oh man! Gillian beat me at bowling! She's so good, she got a turkey!"

"Abby F. is not as good as me at this game!"

"OH MY GOODNESS, Emma just beat the top tennis score. I cannot believe it! I never thought anyone would!"