Monday, November 11, 2013

The Power of Nope

There is optimism. The world of optimism is where I choose to live my life most of the time. Sometimes, my optimism is a bit hard to conjure up. On those days, I live in the twin world of noptimism. Pronouce is like "NOPE-TI-MISM" and you will completely understand what I am getting at. My happy, uplifting, grateful feelings are suddenly shot down by an inner voice of NOPE.

Today is going to be a great day...NOPE!
I am truly blessed...NOPE!
I am worthy of good friends and love...NOPE!
I will do this well...NOPE!

Please go away power of detention. Polyanna called, she wants her
rosy glasses back.

Tuesday, November 05, 2013

Survival of the Fittest, Hoarders and the Apocalypse

So, those who know me well, or even remotely, will know that I often quip, "Well, when the apocalypse comes, you'll be grateful for....[fill in the blank]" It's often filled in with something like "a plethora of fire arms," "extra knives," or even just "food bank food that you haven't eaten yet." The point of the statement is to say that some things seem of extra value when you imagine being lucky enough to be in possession of them during a time of nationwide scarcity.

One of the more recent times I recall using this statement was when I was at my ex-in-laws, searching for a bag of summer clothes we had left there for storage through the winter. Every time Scott tissue goes on sale, the mother-in-law must buy the "max per shopper" amount, because she currently has over 560 rolls of toilet paper in her basement. I poo-pooed this stocking up (pun definitely intended) until I thought about what a hook-up she would be during a world war or natural disaster. Dude, we use that toilet paper for some SERIOUS barter in a collapsed economy. Bring it on! (ok, maybe not "bring it on," I might have gotten a little carried away).

But in all veracity. Think about it. During a catastrophic event, where there are no longer stores at which to shop or a currency that holds any value, hoarders and pack rats have it made. The people who lived sparingly, always donating their skinny clothes are going to be S.O.L. when there is nothing to eat and skinny clothes are needed again. So, while I do not encourage hoarding and extreme couponing...perhaps there is a reason both are kind of in an up trend right now.

So the next time you figure that the 50-roll Costco pack of toilet paper is too much...