Double Stroller Hell

Having a almost-three-year-old and a nine-month-old in the same stroller is like having a wolf and a rabbit strapped to each other. The wolf (Elena) is continually attacking the poor defenseless rabbit (Liam). The rabbit likes to cuddle and pat the wolf, which the wolf does not care for. What used to be a relaxing way to get exercise, has now become a constant balancing act.

Trying to keep the peace doesn't really work. Like the Middle East, it's a case of being squeezed into too small of a place to ignore their differences. I long for the day when they can draw a line between them and not cross it. We need a treaty negotiator. I am getting so tired of hearing:

"NO WEEEEEEEEEUMMMMMMMMMM (Liam) MOMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYY HE'S TRYING TO GET MY WATER! BINKY! BLANKEY! HAND! HAIR! FACE! Etc."

UGH...Just to prove it, here is my series of attempts to get a picture of them in harmony...

Product Endorsement: SoftWalk Shoes

I LOVE these shoes. They are as comfortable as a sneaker, BUT with massaging action. You have to get some to believe it...really...trust me...Plus, you can get them online at their SoftWalk website for half off (well, some styles). Check them out here.

Childhood to Death...

This is not meant to be a depressing post, but everytime I pass this one spot on I-95 South, heading just into Bridgeport, there is this picture I just HAVE to take. Someday, I will stop and take it, but it's in a sketchy area, so for now, this will have to do.
Can you see why this image captivates me so?

You might respond, "It's just all the school district buses parked smack-daddy behind a HUGE graveyard."

Yes, that is all it is. You're right. There's no greater truth there. No hidden message about life and death, youth ending...nope, nada, zip...


Or is there? What do you think?

The Violent Unicorns

Why does my daughter take two fluffy white unicorns and make them fight, squeal, and run away from fire, danger and each other? Why did she say, "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh Noooooooooo...they killed themselves!!" Why do they have to "wun and wun and gally-up and gally-up away from the fire"? (that one I know the answer to, it's more Bambi inspired play).

The easy answer is sugar...we made cupcakes and homemade raspberry frosting. The not so easy answer is that she is quite traumatized these days. One of the toughest things for a child is to have a new sibling. Especially when said sibling gets old enough to crawl around and steal one's things and eat one's animals. I try to imagine what it must be like for her right now. Let's look at the list:

1) She's living in a new house.

2) Her daddy, who was her primary caretaker, isn't around on a regular basis, although we try to visit him every weekend.

3) Her new brother is stealing all the attention.

4) She has to share her beloved Gwammy (also her primary caretaker) with her brother and her Boppa. Now that we're living with Gwammy and Boppa, she always wants Gwammy all to herself...she doesn't always get it.

5) Oh yeah, and she a paranoid, neurotic, upset, loud, fiesty two-year-old red head.

You know when it comes right down to it, I wonder if having a new brother is like being cheated on? Think about it...she had all the attention and thought that being a child was a monogomous thing, then, along comes an interloper. The interloper steals all the love...he's cute and cuddly...well, if she's anything like her mother, she would get super jealous...maybe this is jealousy? Poor, poor baby girl.

See-sauce and Other Funny Sayings...

It's going to be hard to remember a lot of these "on the fly," but I'll try. Elena is at that age where she attempting a lot of language (one might even say TOO MUCH language). Anyhow, she's got some really cute sayings and nomenclature for things. I will try to capture some of it here so I don't forget as time passes.

See-sauce = see-saw, this morning she was making a see-sauce out of a box top propped on top of something so that it would rock back and forth.

Gally-upping = giddy'up and galloping combined...this is what horsies do...they gally-up.

You're killing me nuts = reserved for yelling at my sister's little dog. We think it's a combo between "You're killing me" and "You're driving me nuts."

Weindeers = any kind of deer, even Bambi, his mother, etc. And look MOMMY, dere's WEINDEERS on there!!!

Effphant = elephant, one of three favorite animals. Elephants, giraffes and zebras. There are days when she loves horses more or dogs, but these are the standbys.

Zebra-pants = any striped pants...each day, getting dressed it is a hard choice between horsey pants and zebra pants. Mommy, Liam, Gwammy, and Auntie Cate also have zebra-pants.

Grimp = cross between grinch and grump. Basically it means you're cranky.

Big Purple = most important of all the chenille blankies she has. As of Easter 2007, however, Big Purple is lost. It's been a week. I don't think we're going to find it. There haven't been any tears about it, because I sacrificed a robe of mine (also chenille) that "meminds me of Big Purple, Mommy."

My animals = the thirty or so animals she has made by Schleich. It's getting ridiculous now that she has so many. Her animals love to conga, herd and congregate by type. They also watch her and feel emotions before she does. Example: Yesterday I told her we were going to see Daddy and she said, "OH OH...My animals are SO excited to see Daddy!" or, when Grammy and Grampy showed up, and she was "having a wough day with them" (being shy), "My animals are a wittle bit scared of Grammy."



I'll think on this and update with more later...

I Have a Theory

Once, a long time ago, my mother was sitting with her group of close women friends. They were all musing about what made them sure that they would marry their husbands. The group seemed split in two. Half thought that their husband would make a great father, best friend and long-term partner. This half was highly practical in their choices. They chose based on their head and gut more than their heart. This is not to say that they had any less success in their marriages, but they weren't driven to marry due to passion.

The other half of the group WAS driven by exactly that, passion. They didn't really know if their choice was the smartest, or most harmonious, all they knew is they couldn't live without being close to this person. Kissing that person, and feeling the fire of passion that burned inside them, was the sole reason they just "knew" it was right. This group was led by their hearts and, um, other parts.

So, between the two types, which are you? Which are you inclined towards? Do you buy this theory? Are their other options I'm missing?

The Ultimate Forward

I got a forward from a friend today. I, like some friends of mine, refuse to "do" forwards. Usually they are pointless and prey on insecurity and superstition. However, my one exception to this rule of forwards, is forwarding and responding to test, quizzes and anything that is more personal than it is gimicky. I got the best forward I have gotten in a while and I thought I would share it with you here.

The concept is simple. It requires very little effort on the sender's part or the part of the receiver. It's enlightening. It can further a friendship and it does all this in one word. This is why I call it the ultimate forward. See if you agree...

The Game is On
Describe me in one word...just one single word. Send it to me and only me. Then, forward the original message to all your friends and see what they have to say about you.

So far I have gotten back:
GENEROUS
BENEVOLENT
CONNECTED
CREATIVE
EBULLIENT
BRAVE

AND...

EFFECTUAL (with the following caveat)
I don't think this word is generally used to describe people...more likely to describe a thing or action that provides a successful outcome. But if you look it up in the Thesaurus, you'll see why I chose the word. It encompasses the first 20+ words that came to mind when I read this email.

http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/effectual

I Could Not Resist...

It must be the anticipation as you unwrap the fabric outside, then the tie fabric and prepare to be awed by the jewel of the egg inside. I couldn't resist dying more of them. It also helped that when the almost-three-year-old starts acting up, one of the only mollifiers I know is engagement...If I can engage her in a book, a project, drawing, etc. she will immediately change back into my sweet angelic girl. Anyhow, I think these new ones came out even better. I used more vinegar in the water and boiled them for longer...do you like these better, too?

Crabby Day List

1) My Mother-in-law (aka Momzilla) is down at my house, which we recently sold, cleaning out the soon-to-be-ex's stuff. I should be grateful since it's kind of them to help out and pitch in for their son, but instead I find the whole thing annoying. First, there was the annoyance of "When should we come down? What do we need to do? What do you want us to do?" My response? Talk to your son. It's his stuff. Now, however, there is a new annoyance afoot.

This afternoon, Momzilla called from her cell. She shouldn't really have a cell phone since she is fairly deaf and claims it "gets no reception" ANYWHERE. So, the conversation goes something like this:
MZ: HELLOOOO????? HELLOOOOOO??????
ME: Hi there, Mary? Is that you?
MZ: HELLOOOOO???? I can't hear you...this darn thing.
ME: I can hear you, what do you want?
MZ: WHAT??????? HUH?????????? I can't hear you.
ME: (SCREAMING NOW) MARY, CALL ME FROM THE LAND PHONE...YOU'RE AT MY HOUSE, THERE'S A PHONE THERE...USE IT!!!!
MZ: What?? Oh dear...I still can't hear anything...
ME: THE OTHER PHONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MZ: CALL ME ON THE OTHER PHONE...
ME: OK
I hang up and call back on the land line. Now, thank goodness she can hear me. So, she says, "You got a bunch of calls from banks down here at your house in Norwalk, and I think you better call them back...do you know who they might have been?" No, that's why I have voice mail. Then I shake my head and say, "EXCUSE ME? Why are you answering my phone?" Her answer? "Well, I don't know who might be calling." Uh, yeah, that's the point...it's MY phone.

Then, changing the subject at lightning speed, she says, "And...today, you got a call from the Police Benevolent Society saying thank you in the past for your donation and wanting more money...You need to know that it's not a real organization. You're giving your money to a bum."

2) I have a headache and it's about 35 degrees out and it's April...IT'S SPRING...Where's Puxatawney Phil? I want to give him a piece of my mind!

3) I mean, come on, who buys into this crap:

----- Original Message -----
From: "ilasan bello"
Sent: Wednesday, April 04, 2007 4:23 PM
Subject: REPPLY NEEDED
> REGARDS
> MR ILASAN BELLO
> DEAR FRINED
> I AM ILASAN BELLO
> A TOP SENOIR BANKER OFFICIAL OF THE
> FOREIGN REMMITTANCE DEPT
> AFRICAN DEVELOPMENT BANK
> OUAGADOUGOU, BURKINA FASO.
>
> I AM IN CHARGE OF THE FEDERAL RESERVES ACCOUNT
> AND AUDITING ,DURING THE COURSE OF AUDITING SOME ACCOUNT,I DISCOVERED
> THAT A PATICULAR ACCOUNT HAS BEEN LYING DORMANT FOR SOME TIME,AND
> THIS ACCOUNT WAS USED BY THE MILITARY BACK IN 1998-/2000,THE TOTAL
> SOME IN THAT ACCOUNT IS $18.5M DOLLARS.
> FINALY THE REASON WHY I CONTACTED YOU, IS THAT I DONT WANT THE
> GOVERNMENT TO
> KNOW THAT I DISCOVERED SUCH HUGE AMOUNT IN A DORMANT
> ACCOUNT,PLEASE IF YOU ARE INTERSTED TO ASSIST ME TRANSFER THE MONEY
> INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT I WILL BE VERY GREATFULL, AND 30% OF THE TOTAL
> SUM WILL BE YOUR SHARE FOR MAKING THE WHOLE THING SUCCESFUL
> TRANSACTION.
> AWAITING TO HEAR FROM YOU
>
> _________________________________________________________________

Tie Dyed Easter Eggs...

Did you know can use ties to dye eggs? We did it today...It was fun and the almost three year old was able to help pick out the fabric she wanted, swathe the egg in fabric and then secure it with a twist tie. The best part about doing this with the kiddos is...drumroll...NO DYE CUPS, DYE ON THE COUNTERS, AND COLORED FINGERS THROUGH EASTER!!! (of course, the downside is that my mother won't let me eat the eggs because "ties weren't made with edible dyes, Kristen!"

The "recipe" we followed is here.

This was our outcome: