The lovely State of Connecticut was kind enough to grant me dissolution of my marriage today. Yikes! Who ever thinks that just two days after their five year anniversary, they will be celebrating their divorce. I always knew the statistics, but somehow felt impervious to them. To get unmarried is a surreal experience. You arrive at the courthouse and with no pomp or fancy dress, you sign your rights away. You release all your claims on each other, sign collaborative childcare and custodial documents and walk out thirty minutes or so later, free.
The proceedings almost felt staged. The questions, when asked by my lawyer, seemed a touch on the ridiculous side. I mean, she knew the answers to all these questions, I had given her all this information many times. But, it's all part of the laying down of logic. A court case is an iterative form of communication with questions and answers being the method by which new information is disclosed. You are asked questions by friendlies and unfriendlies...although, in this case, there was only the one litigator, mine. Patrick self-represented. The judge was fair (big surprise) and had a sense of humor, which I always appreciate. We managed to walk away owing each other nothing, paying each other nothing and with joint custody. Perfect for our situation.
My only disappointment was that I wasn't divorcing the gentleman before me on the docket who was paying his wife $2500 a month in support and an additional $2500 in support while she has to pay for her big ol' house in New Canaan. Additionally, they had liquidated all their "stuff" which was resulting in him writing her a check for $327,000. Wow, I thought to myself, I really should've married and divorced for the money! Mr. Sykes, I may not have wanted to marry you, but man, your divorce terms sound lovely. I do.